When I enrolled in my graduate studies, I received the list of books for my first semester. In a very innocent way, I asked if I could find them in commercial bookstores. A classmate responded very charitably:
“Hmmm, no…” A slight smile escaped his lips.
“These books are not usually in stock, and it’s up to the bookstore whether they decide to order them, since they’re not commercial books.”
Back then, online shopping wasn’t common. Making payments over the internet was just beginning, and there was a general attitude of suspicion on the part of us buyers. Of course, sellers always assured us the opposite: that purchases were secure, and that payment card information would always be safe. Although reality sometimes proved otherwise.
My responsibilities at the time didn’t leave me much time to search in bookstores, and in addition with the long driving distances, it wasn’t a good combination for me.
In middle and high school, you could buy books from classmates who had already graduated, but the situation wasn’t the same, as in this program, it was common for each student to want to keep their books. And in the undergraduate program, everyone had their own sheet music for their instrument. Core classes were led by each professor, who provided other materials.
For this reason, I thought about making my first book purchase on the Amazon online marketplace. Entering some information online, confirming inventory, and even choosing between new and gently used books was a very attractive option to consider.
I had doubts and reservations in several areas: the security of the purchase, whether the order would actually arrive, the quality of the order, and the appropriate delivery date. If delivery was delayed, I ran the risk of starting the semester without a book and possibly falling behind in the course.
And it happened, that despite all the suspicion, reservations, and doubts, I made the online purchase.
To my surprise, my books arrived before the scheduled date. And my card wasn’t cloned! Hahaha…
The fact that my order arrived before the scheduled date helped me avoid being somewhat paranoid at the door every day. I didn’t have high expectations. I remember thinking that if for some reason the purchase didn’t work out, I would ask for a cancellation or refund if my books arrived late.
From what I remember, that was my first online purchase.
A few months later, it was time to start looking for books for the following semester’s classes. Again, I had a habit of thinking I would buy my books at a bookstore. By then, I had already discovered that the university bookstore ordered some books. Surprisingly, there weren’t always enough books, as there was no way for them to anticipate demand. They stocked books based on when professors gave them the list of materials they would be using each semester, even before they knew how many students would be in each class. And those orders were placed well in advance.
The following semester, I ended up ordering my books from Amazon again.
Little by little, I began to feel okay buying other things, not just books.
I realized that until then, all my orders arrived before the scheduled date, making each arrival a pleasant, anticipated surprise. I waited, but even without any attention.
Interestingly, there was one occasion when an order I placed took a long time to arrive. The following days, I continued to wait, and wait, and wait. It seemed so unusual to me that I even looked for information.
Then I received a reply that my order was lost and that they were locating it. The supplier couldn’t send me another one because apparently the item I had purchased was the last one in stock before they renewed production.
I continued waiting, somewhat anxiously.
In your case, have you noticed what your attitude is when waiting for something?
In the Gospel, Jesus tells us to be prepared, for we do not know when the Son of Man will come.
Obviously, waiting for shipments is not the same as waiting for the Son of Man, but the act of waiting can shed light on our attitude toward waiting.
And it seems that Jesus not only invites us to wait, but to wait attentively.
And you, have you noticed how you wait for what you wait for?
When that order didn’t arrive, I was somewhat disappointed. They told me it would arrive as soon as they located it. And they didn’t. They ended up refunding my purchase.
The reason for my disappointment was that I knew when the order was supposed to arrive.
Jesus tells you and me: no one knows the day or the hour.
Could it be that Jesus is inviting us to trust?
Can each of us trust despite not knowing the details? Or do we expect guarantees and refunds?
If the Spirit leads you, explore with Jesus the Carpenter what your attitudes are when you hope for something. And perhaps you’d like to accept the invitation to learn to trust even without knowing the details.
Marisol
P.S. We can hear about the invitation to be attentive in the readings for the 19th Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year/Cycle C.
